Another one shows up:
They’re coming.
I have a teeny little garden in which I grow various things like yellow squash, canteloupes, watermelon, pumpkin, tomatoes, peppers, eggplants, cauliflower, snap beans, strawberries and loofah gourds. Yeah, loofah gourds, wanna make something of it? (Actually you can: loofah sponges)
The other day, though, I pulled this out:
Which reminded me of something…
Needless to say, I haven’t been sleeping much.
I’m giving it a couple of days, and then it’s going in the soup. Everything will be fine. Just…fine.
Never fails. I get a good thing going, get my spots picked out,
develop a sense that everything’s under control,
and then someone comes along to ruin it.
Oh, you think that’s me? Look again:
What?? Oh, for the love of…Look. Again!
Forget it. Trust me, that’s not me. That’s Russell. He claims we’re related but I just don’t see it.
The jerk showed up a couple of months ago, just sort of hanging around and running away like a typical wild’un whenever D. Krauss came outside. Krauss’d watch him flee around the corner and he’d turn and I’d be sitting there cleaning myself or something and he’d flip out, saying “How’d you do that?” Thought I was some kind of magic cat, I guess, which was hilarious until one day, the oaf actually fed Russell!
With MY food!
Guess the idiot thought it was me, although I really can’t see the resemblance.
Now, I can’t get rid of him. D is feeding the clown, get this, twice a day. And you can bet Russell is playing it for all it’s worth, meowing with this real girly voice and rubbing all over D and letting him scratch his neck.
I even went up into the pergula again on a sympathy ploy,
but all I got was yanked out of the clematis by the back of my neck. I hate that.
So, here we are, Russell and me.
I am not happy about this, not at all. I keep chasing him off next door,
but the guy won’t leave.
D. keeps asking if we’re brother and sister but, you know, I just don’t see it.
Two Saturdays ago, I went to the Winchester Blues House Festival, an all-day outside event. It was hot and buggy but still fairly well attended.
I planted underneath a rare tree offering shade, sat back and enjoyed. Blues is the daddy of rock and roll and, these days, when rock and roll is pretty much dead and buried, I have to get a fix somewhere.
And it was a good fix, a hot shot. The Skyla Burrell Blues Band (careful, the link has instant music) was sooperior, that chick Skyla playing one kickass blues guitar. Ron Holloway, who has played with just about everybody, sat in for one set. Good stuff.
But then, the reason I came: Pat Travers. You know, Boom Boom, Out Go the Lights? Man.
Just blew us away.
But Travers wasn’t the headliner; these guys, the Ori Naftaly Band, were. A blues band from Israel. I don’t know about you, but when I think “blues,” Israel is not one of the places that comes to mind, immediately or belatedly. It seemed like they had structured their act on what they gleaned from music videos, so there was an odd “movie made about rock” vibe to them, but they were okay.
Despite the Moving Wall of Old People that, with unerring accuracy, placed itself in my view regardless of where I sat, it was a good time. Especially with characters like these running around:
Then I took myself off to Orkney Springs for the first concert of the 50th Shenandoah Valley Music Festival, headlined by Dave Mason. When I harken back to those golden days of rock, Dave Mason becomes my avatar. I mean, one of the founders of Traffic, played on Electric Ladyland, opened for Blind Faith…man, the guy was everywhere. So, of course, I had to go.
Orkney Springs is waaay out there, up a treacherous mountain road that would be no fun in the winter. Good venue, though.
It was raining, but I had pavilion seats so did not suffer with the peasants. The rain cooled things off but didn’t do anything for the bugs. Mason’s drummer, at one point, had to stop and spray himself down to keep the rabbit-sized mosquitos off.
The show opened up with a local duo named Chatham Street. Theirs was music for slashing your wrists by. They were on for only thirty minutes, thank God, or I would have jumped off the mountain.
Then it was Dave Mason. No pictures or video because they requested we do not do that, and I am a respecter of arteests. Just take my word for it, it was out freakin standing. Although I would never have recognized the bald old guy up there swinging a guitar if I happened to pass him on a street, it was, obviously, Dave Mason. Hasn’t missed a lick, even if, as he attests, he can no longer assume sitar-playing position. Broke a string in the middle of a set, so that gives you an idea. The guy with him, Jason Rohrer, is one jaw-dropping guitar player in his own right. Can’t give you a reference on him because it was supposed to be Jon McEuen but on-stage banter strongly indicated Rohrer had been playing McEuen’s spot the past couple of weeks. No idea what happened.
No matter. Got my fix. Now I’m lookin’ for the next one.
Ya know, I didn’t even hear about it until late yesterday afternoon, when I caught a couple of random tweets about it. Thought: “Ha! I hope someone makes that movie!” I did not know someone actually had until about 1930 (7:30 in the evening, for you civilians), while watching a previously DVR’d episode of Ghost Hunters (yeah, I watch it. Sue me) and saw the promo.
It really wasn’t a Sharknado as much as a Sharkicane. But that sounds like a geriatric shark (or an antiseptic shark) which no one would watch, so SyFy chose to emphasize the last ten minutes or so, when three (count ’em, three) Sharknados (or is it Sharknadoes?) actually showed up. Now, best I can determine from the opening sequence, the sharks were seeking revenge for a shark fin soup deal gone bad. Why they picked Santa Monica, dunno. I’m guessing enough of the populace is sufficiently stoned enough of the time that no one would really question a Sharknado. I mean, if they’d showed up at San Diego, everyone would have gone, “Oh, please,” and the thing would have dissipated.
There was some kind of family subplot going on that I really didn’t care about, except Tara Reid was involved somehow and I was thinking she might take off her top. She didn’t, but I stayed for it. John Heard, the only other recognizable face, was in it, too, but not for long. He got Sharknado’ed pretty early, primarily because he was under the opinion that a bar stool was the most effective weapon against them. I don’t think he took off his shirt, either.
I have no idea who the other actors (term used advisedly) were and, really, don’t care. Their function was to run over here and look at something, then run over there and look at something else. With chain saws. And a shotgun. The stripper, who said she wasn’t a stripper, is the best skeet shark shooter in the country. When the sharks were walking around (or wiggling with great energy), though, she had to put about 20-37 rounds in each of them, which means she ran out of ammunition quite a bit, which made shark skeet shooting a bit problematic. But there’re always chains saws. And homemade bombs thrown from helicopters. Did you know you can dissipate a Sharknado by throwing a homemade bomb at the convergence of the warm and cold air convections which are creating the Sharknados in the first place? Without too much buffeting of your helicopter which is flying into a tornado, filled with sharks?
Some suspension of belief is necessary.
I am amazed that the hero (I don’t know his name. Tara Reid’s ex, or sometime, husband in the movie. Which tells you a lot about this guys’ judgment) knew exactly which of the flying sharks in which to leap with a chainsaw so he could cut his, and the previously swallowed stripper, out of it. I mean, all sharks pretty much look the same to me. Except hammerheads. Which go splat when they land on you.
By the way, Sharknado was preceded by Super Shark , which you’ve got to see for the walking tank more than anything. It kicks.
So, bad movie, really bad movie, Mystery Science Theater 3000 bad. You’re welcome to watch it and judge for yourself, but, be warned: Sharknado will give you a Sharkbotomy.
I first heard about Richard Matheson back in the 60’s, when I watched a Saturday afternoon TV showing of The Incredible Shrinking Man. I was ten or so, and the cat scared me to death, ditto the spider. But, that ending…I was blown away, as any ten year old is capable of being blown away, by the idea that a man was going to enter eternity from the other end, from the smallest of gateways. I wondered if Robert Carey was still shrinking, still wandering the particleverse.
For some reason, Richard Matheson’s name stuck with me from the credits, and it was always a delight ever after to be watching a Twilight Zone episode and see his name there, or know that the excellent beatnicky movie The Last Man on Earth was actually I Am Legend, which I got around to reading when I was a teenager and found superior to the film and its subsequent versions, The Omega Man (although it was pretty cool) and that last dreadful one with Will Smith. Seemed like his name was showing up at least once a week on something or other, from Have Gun Will Travel to other westerns.
So I read his anthologies when I came across them, adding them to the stack of books I collected every ten days or so from the library. He was part of a group of writers I always read, like Ray Bradbury, Robert Heinlein, Damon Knight, Clifford Simak, pretty much the founding fathers of what we now call speculative fiction. Well, my founding fathers, at any rate.
Gone now, just like that little thrill of possibility stories like his provided me back then.
Good journey, Richard.
So, just strolling around the Winchester City walking mall after buying a pair of water shoes so I can wade the Shenandoah in search of the wily brown trout, when I came across these guys:
The Presidents of the United States, Confederate States, the general staffs of the Union and Confederate armies, their wives and children, circa 1863.
Startin’ fights:
Hied I, to the Shakespeare Theater in the District to see The Winter’s Tale, a play I knew nothing about and deliberately did not research because I wanted to see if Shakespeare could still be deciphered in this American Idol world. And, well, yeah, I do have some passing acquaintance with the guy and did read the program synopsis, but Tale is lesser Shakespeare and no memorable line from it comes to mind, so it felt like a level playing field.
And now I know why it is lesser: man, what a bummer of a play. I felt like crap when it ended.
Not because of the performance; oh no, STC was up to its usual standards. The play was directed by Rebecca Taichman, who did an outstanding job with an earlier Taming of the Shrew, and included one of my favorite STC actors, Tom Story, who was a scream in The Government Inspector and proved another scream as Clown in this one. But, I tell ya, Mark Harelik absolutely stole the show. The guy was freakin’ amazing, doing complete role changes right before your eyes, putting on an absolutely hilarious performance as the grifter, Autolycus, and an absolutely stunning performance as Leontes, the King, who should have been on Librium. Maybe this whole thing wouldn’t have happened.
And that’s what makes this whole play such a bummer—the events just shouldn’t have happened. Three deaths, two kingdoms torn apart, two lifelong friends now enemies, sorrow and tragedy simply because Leontes took counsel of his own delusions. Man. So unnecessary. And, yeah, there’s a magical ending and everything’s okay, now, but, no it’s not. It’s never going to be. The course of lives was diverted for nothing more than a misperception, with so many following years of tragedy. The bird with the broken wing does not fly so high, and this is a whole flock of broken-winged birds struggling to reach an altitude of peace, always just out of reach. And, yeah, Leontes suffers his own penance through those same years but, dude, it was all just so unnecessary.
So unnecessary.
The last scene, where the stone rebukes Leontes in the form of Hermione’s statue, got me the most. First of all, the beautiful Hannah Yelland played the doomed queen with such a level of astonished injustice that she just about stole the show from Harelik. If Shakespeare had given her one more scene, then she would’ve. But as the statue, frozen, tragic, she became a monument to how one man can affect so many lives so badly. Even when she is restored to life and kingdom, she bears the cracks across her face forever.
What a bummer.